I’m really digging these 27 day cycles. It’s totally insane for me. I’m used to 45 day cycles and having to wait AN ENTIRE MONTH from starting a period to actually ovulating. This is like crazy with cycles just whizzing by me so quick… I’m like, whoah, seriously, already on CD 12 and ovulating?! CRAZY TOWN
So I guess next week we officially “Try” ?
Every time I wake up in the night to help Lamb go potty I am like UGHHHH I HATE GETTING UP and I start freaking out about the sleep deprivation. I’ve got to have a better plan this time around, or at least a better sleeper. Something has to be different. I cannot go through an entire year like I did the first time as a complete and total zombie.
I suppose I have just said to myself, yep. It’s going to suck. It’s going to be SO BAD sometimes but one day that hypothetical child will sleep. For the most part anyway. I just really hate babies, and breastfeeding, and spit up, and diaper leaks, and crying.
But mostly I’m ready to get this over with and then be done and move on with life. Though at times I admit, I’d like to freeze it. Even though kids grow up and are more independent, life gets so much more complicated in other ways. Hurt feelings. Broken hearts. Sleep overs. Drugs. Danger. OIYE. Stay a toddler forever little one.
So just a few more weeks and I believe we will be officially going for baby #2. Kind of makes me want to throw up in my mouth but also excited to get this ridiculous decision over with.
One thing on my mind has been the Zika virus. We live in Texas. In a city with lots and lots and lots of mosquitoes. Zika has already been confirmed in several people in our city who have traveled to South America. It’s only a matter of time before the virus reaches us and infects mosquitoes.
Of course in the USA we have the ability to fight mosquito infection 1,000 times better than in impoverished countries. We also have ample access to mosquito repellent and air conditioned houses.
But I’m kind of freaked out. It will be summer soon, prime time for mosquitoes here, and although I think our city is already working on mosquito control, it only takes one. The babies with microcephaly is just, so so sad. I can’t even imagine. Those poor families.
We already have mosquitoes. One bit my daughter just yesterday. They are out and about. I think I will invest in some good lotion repellent that I can put on daily. I really look forward to smelling like that. But I really believe it won’t be long until it’s here and like I said, it only takes one. What a scary scary virus.
My spouse and I just had our 8 year anniversary. He happens to be skiing in Utah right now with one of his best friends for the week. I’m home with Lamb, and really she’s at this very easy stage where it’s not a big deal that he’s gone. In a way, it’s kind of easier. I have full reign of the house and can do what I want, when I want, and binge watch netflix in bed until the late hours of the night………. hah. I’m tired now, for my own damn fault.
Two nights ago I was putting Lamb to bed and she definitely stalls a lot. Once in bed she asks to go potty, then her tummy hurts, then there is a hair in her mouth, then the blanket fell off, etc etc etc. After taking her to the bathroom I just sensed that maybe some snuggle time would be helpful. She hasn’t really snuggled with me on the bed in awhile. I mean, we cuddle a little when watching a tv show, or snuggle a little when reading a book. But I asked her if I could hold her in the glider and rock her. She said yes. So I did. And we sat there in silence as I rocked her in my arms (she’s gigantic, like 35 lbs and 40 inches tall). It made me cry. I told her about how I used to rock her when she was a baby. How I would be up all night with her trying to get her to go to sleep. Tears streamed down my face. I was so thankfully that I have been able to savor this time with her, not rushing in to having a second child so fast. After rocking her for 10 minutes I placed her in her bed and she went right to sleep.
Last night I asked her if I could rock her again 🙂 She said yes. So we did. And it was awesome. And I plan on rocking her at night more often until she tells me to stop. It’s the good kind of rocking because it’s not the kind that puts her to sleep but it’s the kind that just settles her down for the night. Last night and the night before she slept all night without a peep. It’s glorious.